Themanwhofellasleep presents: love


Please note: There are pictures on this page. If you roll your mouse near them, a speech bubble will appear. It isn't magic. It's HTML.

1) We sat in the garden, very much in love. The sky above us was vast and empty and we filled it with happiness. We drank each other in, like cups of sweet tea.

People say that when you're in love, there isn't much to say. You're so busy falling head over heels, there is no time for introspection or self-regard. Love takes you out of yourself. It takes you into another world.

Today, my love and me walked down to the sea. We picked up sea shells and she stamped on a jellyfish. We laughed. We shared an ice cream, and it melted down our hands, leaving them sticky and unhygenic. Love is not good for keeping you clean.

2) When I was a young boy, my father gave me these words of advice:

"Never go to Southgate."

But I did. I didn't mean to. But it was so near on the Piccadilly line. I couldn't help myself. And now, as I lie awake in bed at night, I wish I hadn't gone to Southgate. It's places like Southgate, seemingly harmless in their banality, that destroy love. If you are in love, don't go to Southgate, don't go to Enfield. Don't go to Totteridge. It will end in tears. The flame of love will be snuffed out... not by a sudden gust, but by a gradual suffocation.

3) Me and my love wandered the streets, pointing at leaves and laughing like idiots. Love had transformed the ridiculous into the sublime. We danced across London in a bubble, oblivious to the future.

Love is a funny thing, so often mis-represented. The wrong people talk about love: poets, songwriters,'s always the wrong kind of love. There are too many love-songs about fickle, obsessive relationships, and there aren't enough love-songs about mothers and their children.

Next time you are going to say something grand about love, think of your mother. Think of all the unconditional love she gave you. She never divorced you, she never dumped you, she never played you off against your her exes. Well, mine didn't, anyway. And still doesn't.

Mothers do the dirty work that no-one else will touch.

We need fewer Songs for Swingin' Lovers, and more Songs for Clingin' Mothers. Remember to tell your mum that you love her. As the Freudians say..."Oedipus least he loved his mother".